Extra English 24 - Pilot Nick

40

This is the story

of Bridget and Annie,

who share a flat in London,

and the boys next door - Nick,

and his friend Hector from Argentina.

Bridget and Hector

work for Channel 9.

Annie works for the environment

and Nick works as little as possible.

Stand by for Extra.

One for the party

and one for the party hostess.

One for the party

and one for the party

accountant.

Hey, it's Builder Barbie!

Very funny.

Eunice wants some building work done

and guess who has to organise it.

Builder Barbie?

Hey, not for you, for the party.

We're having a party?

What shall I wear?

It's a street party.

We're having a party in the street

to protest and stop the cars.

Nice!

Hey, what's this?

Don't touch it.

It belonged to my grandmother.

Your grandmother? It's lovely.

Yes. It's very special to me.

Well, what do you think?

Captain Chip Hardy,

Pilot Extraordinaire.

Nick, is that you?

It can't be.

Women love uniforms.

Hey, hey,

Builder Barbie and Pilot Ken!

But why are you dressed like a pilot?

I am in a play -

Chip Hardy, Pilot Extraordinaire -

for a theatre festival in Paris.

Now, who is going

to help me rehearse?

Sorry, got to go.

Come on, you know you want to.

- Come fly with me.

- What?

Oh, yes, Chip, I thought

about you all the time.

- Nick, I really think

- Don't tell me, I feel it too -

something's not quite right.

I have got it.

Here. There. Beautiful.

Now, I can fancy you.

Oh, no, Nick, please.

Did you miss me, sweet thing?

Oh, yes, Chip, I thought

about you all the time.

When we get to Barbados

Sorry.

But now, we have work to do.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is

your captain Chip Hardy speaking.

We will now go through

the safety routine.

Exits are here, here and here.

In the event of cabin decompression,

place oxygen masks

over your face, like so.

But please, attend to your own mask

before helping children.

Life jackets can be found

under your seat.

In case of forced landing,

adopt the following position.

Eunice,

- I've got the builders on the phone.

- About time.

Hello. You can start today?

Oh, Jean- Pierre,

how nice to hear from you.

We really need the job done quickly.

We should meet tonight? Oh, yes.

Ah, yes, where to start?

Where? Mm,

that's a very good question.

Where would you like

the building work to start?

I was thinkingin my flat.

- In your flat?

- Oh, yes. In my flat.

Hello? We want you

to start work in Eunice's flat.

Yes, that's right, in Eunice's flat.

- It's 31 Evergreen Street.

- It's 31 Evergreen Street.

That's right. Bye.

- Tea? Coffee?

- No, no, no!

Make it musical, feel the words.

Tea! Or coffee!

Tea! Or coffee!

Thanks.

Hey, Nick, do women really

go for you in that uniform?

Yeah.

But do they know

that you are not a real pilot?

Well

You tell them you are a real pilot?

Maybe.

Hello? Captain Chip Hardy speaking.

Oh, hi, Tiffany.

I love this uniform!

Yes, that's right, sweetie.

Currently flying at 20,000 feet,

heading for Barbados.

Yes, that's right, darling,

above the clouds, above the clouds.

Mayday, mayday

No, no, no, we're just

We're not being attacked,

it's just a bit of turbulence.

Look, I've got to go. Bye- bye.

- Hi, Eunice.

- Guess where this came from.

- DIY shop?

- No. From my flat.

Ah, yes. Have the builders started?

Excellent.

Excellent? Excellent?!

My flat is a mess.

You told the builders

to work in my flat?

Yes, you said.

But the builders were supposed

to work at Channel 9.

Your mistake, you fix it.

- But you

- And until you do,

I'm going to stay in your flat.

We want you to start work

in Eunice's flat.

Yes, that's right, in Eunice's flat.

Captain Chip Hardy,

Pilot Extraordinaire.

I want to ride the pony!

Bridget, I want my breakfast now.

Of course.

- What would you like?

- I want

fresh coconut milk,

two rashers of crisp bacon,

preserve of morello cherries -

on French toast -

and coffee - Italian coffee.

Fresh coconut milk, Italian coffee?

- I don't have

- So, go out and buy them for me.

Horrible!

Captain Hardy,

what are we going to do?

It will be OK.

I am too young to die.

- You have to save us.

- Try to be calm.

But what about my family?

What about my cat?

Pull yourself together, woman.

Excellent! You're really good.

That was like

Catherine Zeta- Jones.

You didn't have to slap me for real.

Sorry, but I…

Hello? Captain Chip Hardy speaking.

What?

It's the director.

What? What?!

Just a minute.

The actress? She's ill?

But we must still do the play.

No, we don't have much time.

Don't worry, I know the perfect

person to play the part.

Oh, yes, the perfect person. Bye.

I…have an extra ticket for Paris.

- Do you want to come with me?

- Paris?

- Oui, oui.

- Excellente!

You call this a breakfast?

That's what I think of this.

And this.

And this.

And I have a little washing for you.

In the bedroom.

Now, what shall I eat?

You call this, 'a little washing?'

Be quiet and do it.

Hi. I got some polish

for Granny's chest.

- Nice.

- Oh, I love it so much.

It really reminds me of her.

Hey, you're eating my party food.

Yes, but

it's not very good.

Here, Charley boy!

Annie, Annie, please.

I don't want to lose my job.

It's only for a few days.

Now, which of you lucky girls

is going to cut my toenails?

I'm going to kill that woman!

No, no, let me.

Are you having fun with Eunice?

Why don't you stay here

while we are away?

No, thank you.

Good luck in Paris.

Oh, Paris, c'est magnifique!

Hector, where were you?

Our play starts soon.

OK, good luck.

Hector, there's something

I've got to tell you.

Your play, it starts very soon.

Where is the actress

who plays the stewardess?

Well, actually she's right here.

Good joke.

The actress, she's ill.

You are going to play the stewardess.

Look, there's your costume.

You are not serious?

You are serious.

Listen, Sylvia,

I am going to fly this plane,

I will need all my crew.

You are a professional.

I am your captain.

Will you fly with me?

No, no. No, no, no.

I am not doing it.

Sylvia, I'm proud of you.

Oh, shut up.

What's that?

- Come and have something to eat.

- The shape looks familiar.

You've guessed.

It is that chest.

I did some work on it for you.

It looked so boring.

I gave it a whole new look.

My grandmother's chest!

Annie, Annie, please.

Annie, Annie, please.

Where is the actress

who plays the stewardess?

Well, she's ill.

You are going to play the stewardess.

Oh, shut up.

That was close!

We nearly missed the plane.

Look at the reviews.

'Irresistible.'

'Dazzling.'

And that was just her legs.

'The hostess was beautiful

in a masculine way.'

What's going on?

Ladies and gentlemen,

we're experiencing some turbulence.

There's nothing to worry about except

that the pilot and co- pilot are ill.

Does anybody know how to fly a plane?

Don't worry, I will fly this plane.

Nick, you cannot fly this plane.

I am Captain Chip Hardy.

I can do anything.

You are just an actor.

Captain Chip Hardy is your character.

But I have the heart of a pilot.

Tea? Coffee?

Wait a minute.

Hello?

Oh, really? Oh, excellent!

Goodbye.

Who was that?

The builders.

Eunice's flat is finished!

Really?

Her flat is ready!

Our flat is ours again!

Hello, girls.

Have you had a nice time?

What happened here?

Just a little party.

It was really fun.

OK, Eunice,

we've spoken to the builders.

Your flat's ready.

You can go home now.

I like it here.

I think I'm going to stay.

Where's my cocktail?

Bring my new wig.

- What do you mean?

- What do I mean?

I am going to stay.

We are back!

Paris was great and

Pilot Ken and Stewardess Barbie.

But he really is a pilot -

he flew the plane!

Well, for a moment.

Till the co- pilot punched me.

What happened here? A hurricane?

Yes, something like that.

Well, Nick, what's this? A new job?

Yes, sort of.

So, Mr Pilot, shall we have some fun?

Yeah, OK.

Will you take me flying?

OK.

Shall we stay here or go to my place?

Let's go to your place.

This place is a mess!

Really, girls,

you should tidy up a bit.

It is the uniform.

At last, she's gone!

I'm exhausted.

Well, if you are tired, can I

offer you some tea or coffee?

Next time in Extra -

Bridget is interested in modern art,

Annie is fighting

to free farm animals,

and who else is coming to dinner?